Anyway as I was searching in google for advice on how to deal with my smelly house mate, I stumbled across a forum for friends to give advice to other people on relationships, life, dating etc.

I decided to provide my advice tonight on some key issues. Feel free to use this advice yourself. I know for a fact that some of my readers can benefit from said advice:

This first thread was too long and I didn’t read it all but I think this guy is basically complaining because he’s too good looking and has a great personality. Girls want him and he’s finding it hard to say he’s not interested without hurting their feelings:

My response:

This is an interesting question about an age gap for marriage:

Response:

This seems to be an ad of some sort but since they posted in the relationship advice section I decided to provide some advice:

response:

This is a girl that wants to make a friend but doesn’t want to come off creepy:

My advice from personal experience:

It all started when I saw that I was developing a slight belly after drinking a lot of beer and sitting on office chairs all day. My idea to turn this around was to go back to my days of working out and martial arts. My attempt to restart my healthier life schedule made me depressed as I realised the retreat of any progress I had previously made but a bit of motivation from my friends and my lovely dog that persuades me to take her for exceedingly long walks everyday has made me fitter than ever.

Today, on the way home from indoor cricket, I realised I was getting too fit. I was one iPod shuffle away from being the douche who wakes up at 4am for a protein shake and a quick jog before starting a joyful morning. This had to stop as I was missing the couch potato, laid back attitude I had on everything. I even started watching the news and reading newspapers!  Anyway… on the car ride home from cricket, I thought to myself… what’s the easiest way to become a couch potato again? And then it hit me…. A cinewheel couch!

Have you noticed how uncomfortable regular wheelchairs look? I have used a wheelchair at times and the only thing that I don’t like about them is that they’re too basic for my extravagant taste in practicality. So without further adieu, I introduce to you the cinewheel couch:

You are looking at a couch designed as a mode of transport while providing the comfort of home.  Is there a better way to get out there and see the world but still maintain a laid-back lifestyle? Surely not! It’s the perfect mixture of a cinema couch and a wheelchair.

Some specs:

• Electronic joystick control which means you won’t have to push yourself around!
• Cup holders for your drinks complemented with a fridge to store your refills at the perfect temperature
• Optional dolby surround sound speakers with built-in subwoofer for that doof doof on your back
• Titanium wheels with shock absorbers to take on any terrain but still feel like you’re on a cloud
• Italian leather
• Optional reading light
• Optional Air conditioning
• Optional game controller holder for the hardcore gamer
• Ideally the couch would travel at a cruise speed of 80 km/h but I don’t think this would be safe

I feel that this amazing product will not only be a competitor for all wheelchairs on the market but segues as well. I mean how convenient is a segue compared to the cinewheel couch when you have to stand to go everywhere and you have very little resources at your fingertips?

Let me know if you’re interested in helping me develop a prototype because I’m not sure how to get the wheels on the couch and provide a safe shock absorber solution. Thanks.

The man motivated me to believe in myself and convinced me that whatever I wanted to do, I could do. Prior to hearing the story of Chris I read about ‘the secret’.  If you have ever read the book ‘the secret’ you will understand that some things happen because “if you believe in something enough, you will receive/achieve/retrieve it”.  It’s all about the law of attraction and holistically, attracting something means thinking about it until you get what you want. I was a big believer in this concept until recently when I thought about something constantly but that just blew up in my face like one of them gag jokes that keep you interested until it either zaps you or makes you smell something you wish you didn’t… you know what I mean!

This one… ‘Item’, let’s call it, made my life miserable but then I decided to do something about it. I thought…. well if I get a job that gives me money to support my drinking habit I would feel a little bit better about life, but it didn’t really help me at all. In fact, I’m drunk as we speak but that doesn’t take away from my poetic style of writing things poetically at all you arsehole douche bags that feel like criticising me for being free and poetic with my great words of poetry.

While having lunch with a table of academics, I decided to lose my inhibitions and drink beer, red wine, scotch and more scotch. I was well drunk before I decided to leave the bar that I was at and headed towards another bar for more drinks in accordance with ‘the secret’ (at this point in time I found scotch quite attractive).  During my walk to the pub I realised that I was abusing any underlying message that ‘the secret’ had to offer, but again, this didn’t work for me on a personal level so it can go fuck itself in the arse with a steel pole full of ridges all over it. I tried to find a corrugated pole image to illustrate my feelings but this is surprisingly hard on google.

Well, the whole point of this blog (which has surely been missed by everyone reading this) is that using the inspiration of Alexander Supertramp (which is Chris McCandless’ gypsy name) I have practically looked into creating a superhero which uses Godfrey commercial quality vacuum cleaners. The Pullman PV11 provides an ergonomic backpack vacuum solution which will provide ample power to allow me to jet pack my way into fighting crime or arseholes; both of which society deems hazardous to the wellbeing of our future.

Before stopping by to visit some friends and colonel sanders (a crowd I missed dearly), I decided to stop by the Godfrey’s vacuum cleaning superstore at Fortitude Valley. The man insisted on selling me the $519 Pullman PV13 as it provided a better commercial vacuuming experience. I ensured him that I did not require the commercial cleaning attributes of the PV13 as all I needed was two sets of PV11s which will provide me with the backpack power I need to soar across the Queensland surroundings.

I can’t describe the big plans I have for my flight abilities with the machinery I plan on buying from Godfrey’s. All I can say is that people around me actually sabotage my creative abilities and future actions with criticism. I don’t care if you don’t like my backpack vacuums or think I’m not good enough to change the world with backpack flight. You will regret your decisions at the end of the day because you conformed to what you believed you thought others would expect of you instead of following what you wanted at your discretion.

“Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth.” Thoreau

“The sea’s only gifts are harsh blows, and occasionally the chance to feel strong. Now I don’t know much about the sea, but I do know that that’s the way it is here. And I also know how important it is in life not necessarily to be strong but to feel strong. To measure yourself at least once. To find yourself at least once in the most ancient of human conditions. Facing the blind death stone alone, with nothing to help you but your hands and your own head.” Chris McCdandless

“If we admit that human life can be ruled by reason, then all possibility of life is destroyed”.  Tolstoy

I recently returned from this year’s curry camp. It was held at Lake Perseverance in Crows Nest or something like that (I think near Toowoomba). It’s out in the middle of nowhere and totally a Blair Witch scene. Most of the camp is spent making fun of our parents. I have to be grateful here as my parents brought me up very much blind to most Sri Lankan stereotypes.  Apparently there are stereotypical Sri Lankan parents that are overprotective, embarrassing at the best of times and totally racist. My parents are just embarrassing.

To get to know my heritage, I participated in many ‘Sri Lankan’ traditions. I also include some of my traditions when going on these camps.  I would like to show you some of the photos so you get a good understanding of Sri Lankan culture:

First of all, it’s all about pouring yourself a drink of scotch that is way too strong and will put you on your arse in about 20 minutes flat. Within these 20 minutes you have to make the most out of your time by participating in as many activities as you can….

Activity one, I took my chances and had a go at Sri Lankan drunken boxing:

Both parties need to have a drink in their hand. Punches are thrown but the winner is the one with the most aggression in their eyes and the most bruises.

I then had a go at some Sri Lankan dancing:

Sri Lankan music is called Baila. It’s basically the same set of songs remixed by millions of artists and most of the songs sound incredibly terrible. The more retarded you look while dancing, the better baila dancer you are. The aim here is to dance with a drink but not spill it.
As you can see. I’m a terrible baila dancer:

This year we brought an unlimited supply of glow sticks. This was great. I had hours of fun with the vibrant colours. I came up with the idea to tie glow sticks to possums but possums are ridiculously fast and can hear me coming from a mile away.

The only real problem with that many glow sticks is that they become like sand at the beach. They start to creep into all your crevises and you don’t know how it got there:

My night was getting good, but then I had my first warning that my time was running out. I took my first fall:

Oh no. I think I’m a bit intoxicated!

But then I saw a couples photo being taken, and by tradition, I had to get into the photo and ruin it for them by looking like a rapist/pedo:

I have to say, years of practice and now I am quite good at being a ninja behind photos. They really don’t see me coming. They ask me what my secret is. I tell them it’s a mix between magic and departicalisation. I have ruined many moments. Most of which are deleted from the digital camera straight away. Above is one that got through.

A few more rounds of drunken boxing and I was feeling quite alive again. The girl in the photo below was wearing pants that can only be described as Bruce Lee’s pants in ‘Enter the Dragon’. These pants were so cool but made me want to throw kicks at her as recently I have had several encounters which made me believe I am about as fast as Bruce Lee.

I was trying extremely hard not to clothes line her off the railing she was sitting on.

A Sri Lankan camp is not a Sri Lankan camp without the touching of the golden chest. This is where all the guys grope the guy with the best chest. This is either judged by a chest feeling like a female’s breasts or a manly chest that is good to squeeze. Either way I don’t condone this as it was my chest that was being groped:

I do look quite proud over my win though.

A little bit more partying took place. I became a general annoyance to everyone:

….and more annoying once we found the megaphone:

Just as I peaked and was singing great renditions of Whitney Houston and Celine Deon songs, my time came crashing down….

I fell and I couldn’t get up. Now I know how that Japanese homeless bum felt when he was abusing me at the Hiroshima train station. He was too drunk to walk over and abuse me so he asked me to walk over to him. Good times.

I hope reading this has educated you on the culture of Sri Lanka. There is not much to being Sri Lankan and if you find that you are an outsider, here are three tips to fitting in:

• Drink excessively and shout everything you’re saying
• Use lots of hand gestures and dance like you have no control over your own legs.
• Complain about everything around you

Hope you can join me for the next Sri Lankan camp.

We had originally planned on having some drinks at the pub and later going for the Brisbane Lions Vs Sydney Swans game. Being only a hop, skip and jump away from the stadium, we decided this was a bad idea as it started raining and there was more scotch and coke to be drunk at the premises we were residing at. We felt like we were doing Australia a favour by increasing the average amount of litres of beer and scotch drunk per year on average (which we and a strange Czechoslovakian man found quite appallingly low as stated on the back of a keno card). Apparently only 97.6L of beer is drunk per year on average per person, and even less on spirits… Come on Australia…. Lift your game! This Czechoslovakian man had a thing for Dave. Unfortunately Dave couldn’t really understand much of what he was saying to spark up a true and meaningful relationship, so the man slowly departed after a long and contented chat.

During our hours of drinking, we had enough time to talk about many meaningful and academic subjects. Unfortunately, we only really spoke a lot of crap about nothing (but you must admit this is the best kind of conversation). We did, however, come up with some potentially great ideas.

Our first idea, which has been an up and running idea for quite some time is to develop electronic transfers of physical objects such as pizza, scotch, beer, pretzels etc. This will not only be an efficient and revolutionary achievement for the advancement of human civilization but a very easy-to-use way for me and Will to exchange scotch and kebabs during famine emergencies. The money earned from such a superior technology would allow me to buy my $6 million dream house as well as fulfill my long-term plans of hiring Romanian thugs to abolish the use of inefficient, non-cute acronyms and shortcut English from the internet and the vocabularies of all ignorant adolescents/children (maintain KOCS). This technology will also change the face of importing and exporting but that’s not nearly as important.

Our second idea was to optimize the Australian taxi service as we see it today. Ever wanted to be carried to your cab from wherever you sit, dropped off at your place, put in bed and have a taxi driver which speaks proficient English (no questions asked)? Well I do! On the way to Dave’s place the taxi driver provided us with a business card. With it he said, “If you want English speaking cab drivers you can call this number. We can guarantee these will be English speaking cab drivers but you will be charged a surcharge of $11.” I thought…wow (he also tried to put on an Indian accent which was quite amusing) that’s a bit shit…but hey, if that’s not a sprouting idea for our taxi cab business, then what is! We can simply provide a surcharge for our services but have your information in a database through your mobile phone’s IMEI number. This way we know who made the call. We can then pick you up from wherever the call was made, carry you to the cab, take you home, put you in bed, and then send an invoice later on in the week when you are sober and able to pay for it.

Those were our key ideas. We had another idea but I forgot what it was. I’m sure it was equally as good as the others. I’m actually amazed that I’m still up and writing. I took a short break from writing this blog and started playing Prince of Persia on Playstation 3. I am great at this game now that I know how to kill people in it. It takes me a while to learn how to play games. I would classify myself as a quick learner of a lot of things, but not video games. I am about as good as a blind child trying to play badminton with soundproof ear muffs on. I would like to take my statement back as being a quick learner. I don’t think I am.

Anyway I have nearly completed most of the things on Prince of Persia. In a sense I feel quite happy about it as I have never really played a game for longer than about 4 hours before totally giving up and sulking in a corner. This game, although hard at first as I didn’t know how to do any damage to the things I was supposed to kill, has turned out to be quite awesome.

I’m now going to warm up some spicy lamb sausages. I think vomiting my food up at Dave’s place thanks to his super spicy sauce (which actually had a warning for drunken people not to eat it) has made me hungry again. That sauce is ridiculous. While I was vomiting the sauce, the fumes from my vomit actually made my eyes burn. I can only hope the sauce is not so punishing tomorrow morning on the toilet. You should try these spicy lamb sausages. They are delicious.

 I love animals and have a beautiful dog of my own. I must admit I treat her like a daughter and celebrate her birthday with a big dog treat, but that’s as far as I will go in terms of personifying my relationship with my dog. I for one can tell the difference between a dog and a human being but there are a lot out there that cannot distinguish this gap, and this number is increasing. Here are just a very few examples from a plethora demonstrating the merging between the dog species and the human species:

• Leashes for babies
• Car Seats for dogs
• Baby/Dog Birthday cards
• Balloons with paw prints
• Pet motels
• Dog clothing
• Dog Grooming
• Dog Party Planners
• Dog Spa Products
• Dog Umbrellas

It recently came to my attention that people have decided to take the personifying of dogs to a totally new level. Some moron out there decided that it was a good idea to elope their dog with another dog. There are various issues with this to start with:

1. How does a dog stay faithful to the one dog till death do them part? Do they even know of this sacred contract? Have they heard of the term monogamy? Probably not right, I mean they’re just dogs…
2. How do you know that dog is in love with that other dog or if it’s just lust? We as humans make that decision on our own. You can’t just say… “aww look they get along so well. Let’s marry them.”

…and if this wasn’t enough, a bigger moron in India decided to marry their nine year old child off to a dog to protect their child from evil (there has actually been several cases of this). Now she is protected from evil, but she is cursed with the life-long marriage to a dog. What is worse? It seems that some people are just stupid and I just put it down to pure and simple stupidity, although some of us see the irony in this situation a lot more than others:

 Even though this is some pretty weird stuff, a huge market has been opened for stupid inventions within the grey area of babies and dogs. Now that this market is growing, it is time to think of the future.  I have started to develop some ideas over a few drinks and have come up with the following concepts which will no doubt be appealing to those “Pet Parents” which treat their dogs like babies:

The fetchsaber

Demonstration of the fetchsaber in use

Pretty much speaks for itself. I know my dog loves a good game of fetch with a stick. Why not try a fetchsaber. It comes with the following advantages:

• You can play endless fetch games in the dark and not be worried about losing your stick
• It is very easy to spot when throwing into the waves at the beach
• As your dog runs around, the stick will look like it’s moving by itself. This provides a party ambiance

The TITAN surgical collar

Ever seen a dog with a surgical collar and felt sorry for the poor fella’? Doesn’t every dog with a surgical collar look down and low on confidence? Why not spruce up their surgical collar wearing period with a TITAN surgical collar!

Before and After Shot - Stand out difference in fashion

The TITAN surgical collar comfortably prevents the dog from picking at their surgical wounds while at the same time providing comfort and confidence with style and fashion for the dog. Parents don’t be too alarmed, here are the following advantages:

• Fashionable outfit masking the traumatic time for your dog
• Novelty for the pet’s parents as their dog is temporarily turned into a fashionable robot-looking badger/dog
• Provides neck support and covering of surgical wound
• Water proof

The dog play chair

Ever seen a baby in a play chair with all these toys surrounding it? If you haven’t trust me… they have a ball just rolling themselves around while distracted with dangling objects. Now I bring you the same concept only this one accommodates all the entertainment needs for a dog:

Dog play chair

The aforementioned design includes intricate detail in order to ensure your dog is as comfortable as he can be in his play chair. With neck support, adjustable height levels and 4 holes for each leg of a dog; your dog will have endless fun chasing the bone he will never reach.

The following safety features have been incorporated:

• Wheel stoppers for steep inclines
• Tail hole for those dogs with longer tails than others
• A broad base to negate toppling from over exertion 

Phone MUM

Phone MUM - Pet telephone service

Has your partner ever passed the phone over to your dog; only to hear the cute barks and panting of your loved pet over the phone? I haven’t but I’m sure it’s lovely. What if you could have spontaneous out-of-the-blue phone calls from your pet?… and wait for it… They can call you on their own! You’d pay a million dollars for that right?

Well here it is: The phone mum telephone for your pet.  All your pet has to do is push the paw shaped button on his personal pet phone and get a direct connection to your selected phone number (user programmed). Your pet will then be put on speaker where it can hear your voice and respond to any remote commands that you give it.

Features:

• Paw shaped button, accessible to any sized pet (but not extremely large ones)
• Display Screen for phone number programming
• Durable plastic for outside use
• Available in various colours

Velcro Muzzle

Velcro Muzzle. Impress your friends!

Ever played a game of catch with a friend but he dropped the ball all the time? Then ever bought those Velcro hand things from Toy World and played with that friend; making it 3 times better because now the ball actually stuck when you threw it at him? Now just swap the word ‘friend’ with ‘dog’ in that previous statement and you have VELCRO MUZZLE!

Yes this intuitive but dog-friendly product will allow even the most uncoordinated of dogs to have a chance at playing in the big leagues (with you at the park). The genius design takes advantage of the dog’s instinct to catch the ball in its mouth, only to let the Velcro do the catching for it! Have hours of fun as the dog looks for where the hell the ball actually went!

Features:

• Security standard muzzle performance
• Available in all colours for all dog shapes and sizes
• Machine washable
• No more slobber all over the tennis ball

Feel free to use or modify my ideas. I only ask that you let me know of your concepts before you make millions of dollars from them.

It started off with a delicate phone call asking me to come and have a look at a computer that just doesn’t seem to be running well. I frustratingly dropped all the important things I was doing at the time (probably not important but far out I can do what I want because I’m not your freaking slave) and went to their place to check out this ‘unwell computer’. I get there and I’m greeted to a billion pop ups to online casinos and supposed competitions that had been won by me. Great… I felt like saying… “Oh guys, you have accessed some seriously illegal content. You need to stop using computers because you are just too useless at technology. Yeah… look it says here in this word document that you are banned from the internet….nothing I can do”. Instead I just smiled, deleted the useless crap off the computer and told them to use Firefox. Surprise surprise, the next day I get a phone call courteously telling me that I didn’t fix the problem properly and the problem is back. Angry by their attitude I decided to march over there and punch them in the face. Unfortunately I politely investigated and to my shock horror these retards used internet explorer and repeated their stupid behaviour (seriously who the hell falls for a flashing banner that says ‘you are a winner click here to download something dodgy!’. Get a clue! You fail at the internet!). If I had to make an estimated guess at how many times I have had to go over there because “my internet just stopped working” or “I can’t find my usb stick on the computer” or “my computer is turning pink” I would say I have been over there enough times, that if I provided an invoice for my time I would be able to buy a fairly appropriate sized 4WD which I would use for the sole purpose of running over their letterbox.

At the moment I am a slave to two separate households. I am collecting mail for one place who I hope are having a terrible holiday in Iraq (I don’t know where they are) and I am babysitting fish for another family because they too are hopefully lost in the Amazon somewhere (they have kids so I take this back, I hope they’re safe somewhere but not having fun). Now seriously, what kind of idiot brings over a fish tank and tells me to babysit (well this would be fishsit) their fish while they are away on holiday? They are goldfish! All I had to do was go to your place and throw turd balls into their tank every day. Why are you so stupid? You can tell they’re stupid because they actually trusted me with the fish. These guys actually saw what I did to my fish when I had them…

Ok I’ll explain… I had 3 fish that I bought from a pet store and I put them in this nice clean tank. I fed them and looked after them for at least a month… then they got boring. I thought it would be interesting if I could have mutated fish, so I decided to feed the fish Pringles, salami slices and put them under all kinds of dietary experiments. Unfortunately the fish died (but not before having babies). I’m telling you these baby fish were insanely mutated. They survived in dirty Pringle water for a very long time, then someone stole my tank and to this day don’t know what happened to them (and I don’t care, fish are stupid).

I feel a bit stressed out because I never really took note of how many fish the tank had in it when it was given to me for caretaking. The tank seems a little roomier these days even though the fish seem so much bigger. I may just be paranoid but seriously these things are supposed to be goldfish yet they are obese and look like giant mutated sea bass. They just look pregnant all the time…. and they are always hungry and looking for food. I feel bad because when I walk past they make their ‘I’m hungry faces’ at me and I fix them up with their turd balls around three or four times a day. How many times a day do you feed fat goldfish? As soon as the turd balls hit the water they go nuts (I swear pet food manufacturers drug our pets but this is another conspiracy that I may write about later if I remember).

The turd balls given to me by their owners is very much close to running out. When this runs out I am definitely not going to buy them new food. I will probably give them Pringles or share my noodles with them, but no way am I paying for fish food to keep someone else’s fish alive. Get stuffed.

I am highly contemplating the idea of creating an invoice for all my services. When these guys return from holidays I will provide them with 30 days to pay my bill or they will not get their fish and mail back:

Formal Invoice for my services

I would take a photo of the fish but I’m way too drunk to figure out how to do the whole photo taking, uploading mathemagics.

This is @cansy having his famous vodka lime and sodas

As I sit here reminiscing about the good old days when I was sober and almost responsible, I am extremely grateful for the forgiveness of others. Three things go through my mind while I think of what I learnt tonight after meeting a diverse online demographic:

1. I am starving and would probably kill a cat for a quarter pounder with cheese (the cheese really makes this burger in my opinion).
2. I have never seen so many people with such different outlooks in life get along so well due to the one common link; twitter.
3. How hard is it to read those name labels after a few drinks let alone remember what was written on them so I could follow people later on tomorrow.

So what does BTUB mean to me? Well someone earlier on in the night told me what it stood for but I don’t remember so I stuck with the acronym of BTUB meaning Booze Time! (usually binge). I have to say I expected to be able to pigeon hole most people of the BTUB twitter community as computer nerds with a fondness for solitaire and who thought a trip to the museum was an adventurous day out but I was considerably wrong.

I don’t really have an appropriate segue for this part of my blog but as I write this I had the TV on and saw a Jet Star advertisement which had a few people talk their way into their 5 seconds of fame. One guy really stood out. He had a voice which made him sound like a retarded giant (apologies if you are the retarded giant). I don’t mean to be rude, but why would you choose a retarded giant to be part of a Jet Star Ad? People do the darnest things sometimes.

I walked into btub with my close friends Dave and Emily. I’d say we have a lot more than just twitter in common. I am comfortable talking to these two without taking on my defensive yet subtle Chuck Norris stance. We had a go at mingling with the crowd and we had some really interesting talks with people. I met Ash who is the blackest man I know. He’s so black, he makes LL cool J look like a malnutritioned caddie for Tiger woods. He is all about the ladies and I wish him the best of luck with that.

I then had a talk with Sally who apparently likes to categorise people by animals and gossip girl characters. To her I am a fox and Dan Humphrey (She ensured me that these weren’t good things). JonoH told me all about his trip to Indonesia and his love for Bintang (it’s just beer). I then spent about 3 minutes laughing about the word bintang.

Emily thought it would be a good idea to introduce me to Kate Edwards who is a celebrity in the twitterverse. She was modest and insisted that she wasn’t really that famous but everyone knew her and Ash actually wanted to be her (or be on her) not really sure at this point in time but she was very nice. Narelle then brought us some Kettle Chips….yeah everyone loves Narelle. She was worried that her nine year old daughter would frown upon her late night pub crawl as she has been a frequent loafer recently. 

Shortly after I met Matt Hooper and we had a very legitimate and logical talk about how poo Windows Vista was compared to Windows 7 which is coming out some time this year. I was honestly trying to be serious Matt. Sorry if I made no sense (great guy).

I then patiently waited for a cab while sitting on the floor, giggling at the people that seemed a lot more inebriated than I was trying to make their way home. I was smug about the whole situation. I get a sober cab driver while you have to concentrate on walking….suckers…

The cab driver stopped at my place and said that will be BLAH BLAH dollars thanks. “Here you go Mr Taxi Man.” I handed him my keycard and said “It used to be a savings account but I’m not really sure anymore”. The man obviously didn’t know dad humour even if it hit him in the face with a king hit by Emily Elliott (who is by the way totally ripped and packs a punch). He took my money and kicked me out of the cab even though I was oh so polite during our whole relationship to my place.

I then returned to my dwelling where I stuck to my habitual process of turning on the TV to late night advertisements with retarded giants, then throwing soft-ish objects whenever I saw something I opposed. The 2x airing of the Jet Star ad triggered me to really wreck my tv with projectiles….really they need to stop showing that advertisement but I digress.